Greg Gutfeld might be juggling sleepless nights with a newborn, but that didn’t stop him from landing a cold, calculated blow on his Fox News colleague — and ratings rival — Jesse Watters.

The two conservative firebrands, who regularly trade jabs on The Five, Gutfeld!, and Jesse Watters Primetime, found themselves in a very real showdown when the annual 2024 cable news ratings dropped on New Year’s Eve.

And while Jesse was likely celebrating a solid year, it was Greg, 60, fresh off becoming a first-time father, who walked away victorious — pulling in 355,000 viewers for Gutfeld! and edging out Jesse Watters Primetime by a razor-thin margin of just 2,000 viewers.

And Greg? He didn’t let Jesse off easy.

Jesse Watters and Greg Gutfeld hosting Fox News (Image: Fox News)

He quote-tweeted the ranking chart and, in classic Gutfeld style, brutally jabbed:

“In your face @JesseBWatters.”

Ouch.

Meanwhile, Sean Hannity’s show came in third with 341,000 viewers — despite his recent headline-grabbing proposal to fellow Fox host Ainsley Earhardt. The Five, the show that Greg and Jesse co-host, followed in fourth. CNN’s Anderson Cooper? A distant 16th with just 147,000 viewers.

But the ratings triumph wasn’t even Greg’s biggest news of the month.

Just before Christmas, the late-night kingpin revealed that he and his wife, Elena Moussa (42), had secretly welcomed their first child together — a baby girl named Mira. The surprise announcement on December 10 stunned fans, many of whom had no clue the couple had even been expecting.

Then… silence.

For weeks, Greg vanished from social media — leaving fans both curious and concerned. He finally resurfaced on Christmas Day, but not with baby photos. Instead, he posted a moody snap of his beloved French bulldog, Gus, lounging on the couch with a deadpan caption:

“As usual, he got me nothing for Christmas. Although he left something that looks like coal in the middle of the living room.”

Later that day, Greg shared a video of himself walking Gus in the snow, narrating the moment with dry humor:

“Oh, he’s happy. Look at him go up the hill. This is good. Probably good for me too.”

But the caption told a different story:

“Upstate sick as a dog. Not this dog. He’s doing fine.”

Fans quickly picked up on the implication — Greg wasn’t feeling great. Still, the mere sound of his voice and his quirky charm was enough to stir emotions.

Greg Gutfeld hosting his Fox show, Gutfeld! (Image: Fox News)

One fan, @lucysanders2962, left a heartfelt message:

“So hearing your voice made me teary, hearing your news about a baby brought tears, watching The Five’s Christmas exchange today brought tears… I’m not the only one who misses you terribly. We need you to come back please.”

There’s still no word on when Greg will return to his nightly show, but one thing’s for sure: between fatherhood, viral dog content, and humiliating Jesse Watters by 2,000 viewers, he’s not going anywhere quietly.