BEFORE SOPHIE… THERE WAS RUTHIE..!— The Forgotten Love Story Between Prince Edward And A West End Star Finally Comes To Light
In a no-holds-barred book, Ruthie Henshall tells the full, extraordinary story of her passionate FIVE-YEAR love affair with Prince Edward
Ihad been performing for just two months in the musical Cats when a rumour went flying round backstage: a certain Edward Windsor was joining the production company.
‘Who is Edward Windsor?’ I asked innocently.
I met Prince Edward for the first time when I was 20 and he was 23. Rather controversially, he’d just left the Royal Marines to begin work in 1988 for Andrew Lloyd Webber’s Really Useful Theatre Company as a production assistant. And so the rumours started that he was gay, because he was working in theatre.
Prince Philip had wanted him to become an accountant but Edward was resolute. As for the Queen, she was flabbergasted.
Ruthie starred as Jemima in the hit musical Cats, making her West End debut at the New London Theatre
Edward’s valet later told me that when the prince joined the theatre, the Queen said, ‘I hope he doesn’t bring home any chorus girls’.
Enter Henshall! I was making my West End debut playing Jemima, one of the Jellicle Cats in Andrew’s hit musical at the New London Theatre. I was feisty, damaged (more on that later) and determined to become a star.
The first time Edward turned up, news that he was in the company office went round the theatre within minutes. I headed straight over to say hello.
He was tall, blond, very calm. I was pleasantly surprised by how attractive I found him, although it wasn’t an overwhelming feeling of ‘Phwoar’. I gave him my best smile and said, ‘Welcome to the litter’.
‘I’m the runt,’ he said, making me laugh. And I thought, ‘You’re not what I expected.’
Prince Edward at the opening night party for the musical Aspects Of Love in London in 1989
Whenever Edward was in the building, I’d make a beeline for him, partly because he was royal and it was a bit of a coup that he knew who I was, but also because I liked him and got a buzz from seeing his reaction to my cheeky, slightly irreverent sense of humour. I’ve always had a potty mouth, and I don’t suppose he’d had many chorus girls flirting with him with such filth.
When he told me he was spending the weekend at Windsor, I smiled and said if he ever needed company, I was his girl.
One day, I sashayed up to Edward wearing a very short ra-ra skirt with matching socks that went up to my thighs. I grinned at him and said, ‘Too much?’ He dissolved into laughter.
The fact that he watched the shows in the evening after work was a real testament to how much he loved theatre. And maybe, just maybe, the regularity with which he showed up was a hint that he was becoming especially interested in a certain feline.
Edward and I really began to spend more time together when, to my delight, Andrew started creating a musical version of A Star Is Born (which never came to anything because he couldn’t get copyright) and wanted me to work with him on the songs.
The best thing about it was that Edward took me to my rehearsals, sometimes sitting in, then walked me back.
After a while, he started to kiss me goodbye on the cheek. Just a single kiss. And a couple of times, he made me a cup of tea.
I found him charming, funny and approachable. I remember seeing his beautiful handwriting once and saying, ‘Cor blimey, mate – you didn’t go to a comprehensive school!’
When Ruthie started rehearsing for A Star Is Born, Edward invited her to the Palace to watch the Judy Garland film version
One day in May 1988, two months into rehearsals, Edward asked whether I’d seen the Judy Garland film version. ‘Would you like to come to mine to watch it?’ he said, adding, ‘We can have a bite to eat’. I was being invited to dinner at Buckingham Palace.
The date was set for Sunday. Wearing a leotard and denim dungarees, I drove down the tree-lined Mall in my beaten-up Vauxhall Nova. At the famous wrought-iron gates, I gave my name to the policeman. He let me in!
Ruthie backstage on the opening night of Peggy Sue Got Married at the Shaftsbury Theatre
Edward’s quarters were on the second floor, on the front right-hand corner overlooking the Mall. I noticed each door along the corridor had a typed card in a brass holder, naming its royal residents.
His apartment had originally been the nursery area for Andrew and himself. The bathroom alone was the size of my whole flat, and my favourite part was the loo.
It had a big square wooden seat, a chain pull and a curtain around it. So someone could be in the bath and someone else could privately relieve themselves.
Also, as I discovered later, Edward had nametags in all his underwear. Yes, ‘HRH Edward’ adorned every piece. Think about it: all the washing is done by staff, so it needs to be obvious whose knickers are whose.
‘Edward had nametags in all his underwear’
We were served dinner by Edward’s valet Brian in the huge living-cum-dining room on a beautiful antique oak table so highly polished I could see my reflection. While we were eating, I suddenly thought, ‘How the f*** did I get here? I’m in Buckingham Palace, sitting next to a prince, with a Bacardi and Coke, and I’m about to watch A Star Is Born. How much camper does it get?’
My proudest moment was sending the peas flying all over the table, picking them up with my fingers and eating them one by one off the tablecloth. Classy bird. Then we watched the film.
When I left, Edward kissed me – not a huge, passionate kiss, but a gentle kiss on the mouth. And I thought, ‘Ah, OK.’
Two weeks later, he invited me to join him at the Palace again. This time, he was so attentive that I knew it was more than work. Once again, the date ended with a gentle press on the lips.
After that, Sundays became our day to meet, because it was my one day off. At first, we’d walk around the Palace grounds, which could take an hour as the walled garden is the size of a park – over 39 acres.
On Ruthie’s days off she would walk around the Palace grounds with Edward, which could take an hour due to their size
‘As we lay on the blanket, Edward asked if it would be alright to kiss me. “God, yes,” I said’
Ruthie and Edward go out on a dinner date in 1993
‘He sent me a letter asking me if I’d be patient about sleeping together. He didn’t want to go too fast’
Our first passionate kiss happened at Windsor that summer, three months after our first date. That particular day we’d packed up a picnic. Well, let’s be honest, someone in the Palace kitchen had packed up a picnic – complete with sandwiches with the crusts cut off.
Edward had driven us to Windsor for the day in his Rover Vitesse. His protection officer sat in the front passenger seat while I was in the back, like a teenage girl being driven by her dad.
We dropped the car at Windsor Castle, but Frogmore estate, just over a mile away, became our favourite spot for a picnic. Set in the private grounds of Windsor Home Park, it has a pretty white stucco house and an amazing lake.
Ruthie and Edward arrive for dinner at a quiet riverside restaurant in Fulham in 1993
I walked around the house, peeked in through the heavily curtained windows, and daydreamed that I’d one day live there with Edward. In fact, no royals lived on the estate until 30 years later, when Meghan and Harry made it their home.
I must say I felt a pang of envy and sadness when I heard they were moving in, as it remains very dear to me as our romantic place.
On that particular day, as we lay on the blanket, Edward asked if it would be alright to kiss me. ‘God, yes,’ I said. I’d been wondering how inappropriate it would be for me to snog him first.
Ruthie and Edward shared their first kiss in Windsor
So we had our first properly passionate kiss. It was lovely. No clashing of teeth, and no tongues either at that point.
After this snog, I assumed we’d be falling into bed. I think on the next date I tried to get inside his clothing, and we rolled around together.
But the following day, he sent me a letter asking me if I’d be patient about sleeping together, as however much he fancied me he didn’t want to go too fast and spoil something so special.
I understood his caution. We were both working in an industry where people gossip, so he had to be sure. But I was sometimes very frustrated by the slow-burn pace of our courtship. I wanted to get in there.
For two people who grew up in totally different worlds, Edward and I found we had so much to say and the conversations between us became much deeper. We trusted each other. We talked about books and television programmes and our families and the people in the Really Useful shows. It was just like talking to any of my friends.
Although he was moving slowly, he was consistent and a real gentleman. One Saturday night, a few weeks after ‘the kiss’, Edward invited me round to the Palace after the show.
‘If you want to bring some pyjamas and a toothbrush, we could have a sleepover,’ he said. It would be platonic, but it felt like the next stage.
He said he’d take a nap in the afternoon because he wasn’t used to my hours. Our schedule is crazy in the theatre: up at about midday and not going to bed till three in the morning.
When I arrived, he was beaming. I was smitten by then and could see he felt the same way.
His bedroom, decorated in muted tones, had a king-size bed with impeccably ironed sheets. It was extremely tidy for a 24-year-old’s, but then he’d been trained by the Marines.
This was the first time I stayed the night, although we were both in pyjamas. Waking up together felt like another milestone – I could see that our relationship was progressing in a really romantic way, as opposed to flings where you go out, get slaughtered and find yourself with someone because you ended up in bed together. Another plus was he didn’t snore.
Ruthie could see the relationship was progressing after Edward invited her for a sleepover
Acouple of nights a week, I’d stay over after the show. Sometimes, if I was hungry, ‘Edders’ – as I liked to call him – would make me mini croque monsieurs in the little adjoining kitchen. He’d get the cookie cutter out and make round shapes for his showgirl, who’d just been dancing her butt off for two hours in Cats.
Sometimes I’d kiss Edward goodbye as he went off to work, then go back to sleep. If he had an evening engagement, he’d leave me a note telling me where to find the ice or maybe a sandwich or ice cream. Or he’d save me something from his dinner.
While I waited for him, I’d be in that drinks cabinet getting out the Bacardi and Coke. Edward didn’t drink very much – it wasn’t his thing.
During this time, I also became friendly with Laura on the Buckingham Palace switchboard. Being on the late shift, she’d sometimes have to handle a well-oiled Henshall on the phone at midnight wanting a good old chinwag with my fella. Thankfully, Edward found this funny.
Edward at work as he launched his own television production company Ardent Productions in 1993
One night, I decided to drunk-dial my boyfriend at 2am. ‘Ruthie, it’s a little late to put you through,’ Laura said firmly. ‘Maybe you should call back in the morning.’ I admitted that she was probably right and explained that I’d been at a gay club called Heaven.
The next time I called very late, she said, ‘Have you been to Heaven?’ I said, ‘Not yet, but I’m hoping to if you put me through.’ That made her laugh.
I was definitely falling for Edward. He was so calm and considerate, and very, very different from the younger show-off boyfriends I’d had before, many of whom were theatre performers.
Apart from a relationship I’d had at 15, Edward was my first real love. Before that, I was always moving on, ending relationships, so he really was my significant first.
Ruthie made herself comfortable at Buckingham Palace after Edward had left for work
He had a very gentle, positive energy. I never heard him criticise or trash people. I’d walk in and his whole demeanour would calm me down.
I was this ball of energy and fire who wanted everything immediately. I wanted to do better, achieve more. I could never rest. And he’d just say, ‘It will happen, Ruth. You have a rare talent’. He always called me Ruth rather than Ruthie.
He wrote me amazing letters on Buckingham Palace letterhead paper and would often sign them with three kisses rather than his name, for privacy. The way he expressed himself was very poetic at times and – looking back – quite young. But then, we were young.
And, of course, I was one of the few girlfriends who received a stamped letter with her boyfriend’s mother’s face on it.
Ruthie and Edward on a date night in south-west London in 1993
After a night spent together, sometimes Edward would send a bouquet of flowers to my flat, usually freesias because he knew they were my favourite. If he left early for work, he’d leave loving notes by the bed.
We were at that wonderful honeymoon stage where we couldn’t wait to get back to each other, and he’d say that the sooner he left, the sooner he could get back to me.
I remember the total butterflies when he said there was nothing more special in his life than me, which made me wonder, ‘Even more than duty?’
Once, he came back to the Palace at lunchtime from Really Useful and gave me a letter. He sat on the end of the bed and watched my reaction as I read it. He was describing how he couldn’t believe the way he felt about me.
I’d never received anything so beautiful. After I’d read his loving words, he lay in bed with me and we held each other. He said he couldn’t stop thinking about me. Wow!
It was a wonderful moment when we both understood we felt the same way. And of course I told him how much I loved him. It was the first time either of us had said it.
I was sitting in his bed in his dressing gown, just feeling on top of the world. This man was declaring his love and I felt safe enough to say the words back. Then he went to work, and I remember writing him a love letter and leaving it on his desk for when he got back in the evening.
It did make reading press articles about the young, free and single Prince Edward quite hard, though. That year, a women’s magazine ran a ‘Who’d Want to Wed Ed?’ feature. I bloody did!
Early on, Edward had let me know he preferred our relationship to remain hidden. He liked to keep his privacy and didn’t want me to be subjected to media scrutiny.
The secrecy could be fun. I remember a Sunday brunch at Kensington Roof Gardens, a mixer for all the Really Useful performers. He was representing the company.
I purposefully wore no knickers, so I could spend the whole time walking around the party and then coming back to him, leaving him under no illusion about what I was doing – trying to tempt him into bed. And not to sleep.
For the first few months, we existed in a lovely kind of bubble. But then Edward started to take me out for supper sometimes, when I wasn’t doing a show. It wasn’t entirely romantic, as one of his lovely protection officers would be making up a threesome.
Reportedly, the Queen had only ever been to one restaurant in her life. Charles tended to eat at exclusive private dining clubs. Sarah (Fergie) later complained to me that Andrew had never even been to a pub.
But Edward often went to cheap and cheerful Soho restaurants. He’d join the cast and crew for egg and chips in a greasy spoon, loving the camaraderie as everyone squashed around small tables.
As time passed, I met some of Edward’s friends from school and university, who seemed very down-to-earth. They weren’t all upper-class but they were educated and good people who were fiercely loyal to him. It’s quite telling that today they’re still in his life.
One charming chap, Peter Fraser, who left the marines at the same time as Edward, became the judge who oversaw the group litigation brought by the sub-postmasters against the Post Office after the Horizon IT scandal.
I think Edward’s friends guessed I was his girlfriend. There were times we held hands under the table.
He met some of my theatre friends too, although very few ever knew we were in a relationship. He was always good company, very warm, no airs and graces. My friends were soon completely at ease with him.
Ruthie enjoyed the secrecy of her relationship with Edward
‘When we finally made love, it happened very naturally. He was romantic and gentle and definitely NOT GAY!’
I was now spending most weekends with him. When we finally made love, in January 1989, it happened very naturally.
You know when you watch those romantic chick flicks and the guy holds the girl’s face and gently kisses her? He did that! I was in my own movie.
He undressed me and took me to his bed and we made love for the first time. He was romantic and gentle and definitely NOT GAY! And he clearly had experience.
I remember he looked at me like I was gorgeous – something I never really felt inside. It felt like such a natural thing to happen because it was coming out of love. There’s nothing like sex with someone that you love, as opposed to those you just fancy.
Later, I’d often shag him into oblivion, leaving him bleary-eyed when he had to get up early the next day.
EEven though I was happy with Edward, I was keeping a secret that to me was a constant source of shame. An uncle by marriage, a father with young sons, had abused me.
My sisters and I used to stay at his house sometimes when Mum and Dad were away at an event. The first time was when I was six, and it was pretty violent. It happened again when I was eight or nine.
Afterwards, I was very frightened because I knew that if I told my parents it would lead to trouble. At that age, you have no idea what is appropriate for an adult to do to you; you just know it feels bad.
When you’re sexually abused as a child, you’re never the same again.
I started to pull out my eyelashes and eyebrows when I was about ten, probably as a reaction to people making comments like: ‘What a beautiful girl – look at those eyelashes’. I didn’t want to be seen that way.
I still live with trichotillomania (‘trich’). And it’s ritualistic – it has to be a single lash at a time. It’s a real compulsion, impossible to stop even if my eyelids bleed.
Eventually, my uncle’s wife discovered what was going on. I seem to remember she walked in and saw him touching me, and then her hitting and kicking him down the garden.
She waved a finger in my face and warned me not to say anything to my parents, who, she claimed, would be furious with me. But I do believe she stopped it.
The world no longer felt safe. I fantasised on and off about ending it all. When my body started to change at 14, I was horrified. I didn’t want to become sexually attractive to men.
I used to slap my breasts and say, ‘I don’t want these things sticking out in front’. I demanded the hairdresser cut all my hair off.
Later, I found it very, very difficult to stay in a relationship. I was always running. I think it’s part of the reason I’m such a driven person.
I used sex as currency, knowing it would get me attention, make me wanted, but underneath I was just desperate for a man to love me and look after me. To keep me safe.
Occasionally self-disgust would sweep over me during sex. For years, I had to be tanked up, really trolleyed, to make love.
Ruthie pictured in a school photo during her younger years
Not with Edward, though. I felt clean with him.
Even so, during our early months together, I finally accepted that I needed professional help. I was pulling out my eyelashes constantly and numbing myself with alcohol.
My GP referred me to a psychiatrist and I began to open up about my life, including Edward (because I could tell so few people about us). The psychiatrist asked me to bring in proof that I was seeing him. A letter or something.
What a creep! I suppose he saw a messed-up 21-year-old chorus girl and thought, ‘There’s no way’.
I brought in a letter the following week, but I’d lost trust in him and stopped the sessions.
Ruthie’s relationship with Edward helped her accept she needed help from a professional
The month after we first made love, Edward took me to Windsor Castle. It was a real pinch-me moment as I was driven into a courtyard that the public couldn’t access and met by staff who welcomed us into the main hallway.
We ended up going to Windsor a lot, but I do remember that first visit because my brain was racing as I thought: ‘How did I get here?’
One summer day, Edward gave me my first-ever riding lesson there. He’d often mentioned how much his mother loved horses, and I’d said I always wanted to learn to ride.
For the lesson, I was dressed completely inappropriately in jeans, a leotard and a stripy batwing cape with giant shoulder pads. I believe I turned up in platform shoes, but at least I’d brought some trainers – useless because they couldn’t grip the stirrups.
Edward was incredibly patient, but I think he was more amused than proud of me. After the embarrassing riding lesson, we walked from the stables to the castle, where I was going to change into the skirt he’d asked me to bring along.
Edward took Ruthie to Windsor castle for her first-ever riding lesson
‘Gosh, that looks like the Queen…’
Edward with his mother Queen Elizabeth at RAF Benson in a Royal Marines uniform
‘Oh f***, it IS the Queen!’
As we approached, however, I could see a table of people on the lawn having what looked like afternoon tea. One of the party got up and started waving and heading towards us.
The way she carried herself looked familiar, as did the fact that she was wearing a tweedy olive-green dress, green cardigan and comfy flat shoes. One does not wear one’s heels if they will sink into one’s lawn.
I thought, ‘Gosh, that looks like the Queen… Oh f***, it IS the Queen!’
It was only later I realised Edward had planned for us to meet ‘spontaneously’, so I wouldn’t be terrified at the prospect.
My father had told me what to say and do if I ever met the Queen. So I knew that you curtsey and call her ‘Ma’am’ to rhyme with ‘Spam’.
She was evidently very pleased to see her youngest son. As she approached, Edward introduced us. ‘Mama, this is Ruth,’ he said.
And all my father’s instructions went straight out of the window. I grabbed her outstretched hand, shook it wildly and said, ‘Pleased to meet you’, forgetting to curtsey. I was mortified for a while afterwards, but she never seemed to hold this against me.
We joined the others – Sarah Ferguson, Princess Margaret, Prince Philip and the Queen Mother – at a table on the grass. It was just as you’d imagine: Earl Grey tea in exquisite china, and sandwiches with the crusts cut off.
I told the table about my first riding lesson and how dreadful I’d been. I’d once seen a girl get kicked by a horse and had been scared of horses ever since.
The Queen told me that horses smell fear. ‘They can pick up on emotions. And never stand behind a horse. It can’t see you, so it will be afraid and kick out,’ she said, adding kindly, ‘I’m sure with a few more lessons, Edward will make a horsewoman out of you’.
Edward didn’t look at all confident about this.
Ruthie had many royal encounters. The actress is seen here in 1994 with Sophie, Duchess of Edinburgh, who married Edward in 1999
Afternoon tea was served by staff, but the Queen was definitely mother with the teapot. She was kind and attentive to me but you could never forget who she was, and everyone around the table, including Sarah and Edward, talked to her with great respect.
This was not the place to tell one of my naughty theatrical stories as an ice-breaker.
Margaret was charming and fun. She adored talking about the theatre – handy as I was performing in Cats – and loved a good giggle.
Philip was good-natured towards me. And, of course, he had that posh accent, which I simply loved. Very Brief Encounter.
As it turned out, this would be just the first of many subsequent meetings with my boyfriend’s family…
